It's nice to be home...and back to normal!

So, I know it's a little late but we got back from Florida on Friday morning; the trip back was kinda awful.... tiny planes, buzzing noises from the emergency door... not cool! It's crazy - I looked forward to the trip since like September of last year and then it kinda turned out to be more stressful than relaxing! But I am glad we all got together! Found out a lot of things that I never would have known... and got to spend some much needed time with my niece and nephew! YAY!!!

Kansas is being its normal self today with storms and tornados! EW! But one exciting thing that happened is Alexis laughed for the first time this afternoon! She was all smiley and making funny faces and I laughed and all of a sudden she just cracked up! It was one of the most amazing moments I have ever had in my life... she got kinda scared... had a look like, "what was that!" but she kept on laughing! So I called Armando and she wouldnt do it again! AND she has not laughed since! I kept asking her too but she wouldn't! :(

I am nuts!

So maybe I am nuts or maybe it is normal but it just does not seem normal!

I find myself thinking about all the bad things that "could" happen to Alexis... and me... I constantly worry about the "what ifs" and just horrible things that would probably never happen but in my head... oh my crazy little head!... they always happen! Last night I was laying in bed, please dont think I am nuts, and I layed there for hours playing an awful "what if" senerio in my head.

I was laying there thinking about going to walmart (there is like 5 different ones here), I was going to go to the walmart by Kohls because I needed to exchange an outfit anyway but as I kept thinking about it - I imagined that I parked on the right side of the parking lot and got out of the car, as I was walking around the back of my car to get Alexis out of the passengers side a car pulled up and a guy got out and grabbed me and as the car pulled away with me inside my poor little baby was still inside my car laying there with no one to help her. I thought about this repeatedly all night - my hands were sweating, I felt like I was going to puke and I caused myself to be in tears! I felt so bad for even thinking it. It's not something I want to happen, it is a crazy unbelieveable fear that I have... it's ridiculous! It's not the only one either, they range from someone breaking in the house, a car running through an intersection and hitting us, someone shooting a gun and it hitting the baby - I dont know what to do... I thought about going to talk to someone but then what am I going to tell them? That I am obsessively having horrible thoughts about what could happen!!!??? It just seems crazy when I think about it! I told my husband today and he was like I am sorry... but really he does not understand! He said he did not understand because he was not having them but that it would be ok... which is very nice of him but am I going to spend the rest of my life feeling like I am going to vomit from worrying??? I mean I am fine with a little worrying but this is NUTS!!! I feel better now that it is out of my head though! Thanks for listening to my crazy thoughts!

Kansas...

So last night there were storms all over Kansas, YAY! Not! It's kinda sad; we sit here every spring/summer time and wait for the tornado sirens to go off. Last spring, about this time, I was out in it all driving only to come back to base and find that even the cops were taking cover! It was crazy! So as we sat here last night and heard sirens from all around us go off the ones on base never did, Alexis was asleep and i just kept thinking about how much it would suck if a tornado actually did come and we had to go to the basement with her... scary! But it never happened. Now I sit here writing about all of this as she lays in her bed crying because she is tired but will not go to sleep!

She stopped so I need to go check on her! haha!

Bye for now.

Oh yea forgot to mention... ONLY 9 MORE DAYS TIL WE ARE IN FLORIDA!!!... It is just so exciting becasue we are all going to be together, kind of like old time just missing several people.

Shopping makes her puke???!!!

19 Feb 09

Wednesday I was shopping with Alexis, or rather she was shopping with me! Anywho... she was sitting in her car seat in the stroller and I was feeding her while looking for a bathing suit... a subject I will just leave alone right now... and I took the bottle out of her mouth and went to give her some tylenol, she had her first set of shots on Monday and was not feeling well for a couple days, so right after I squirted the tylenol in her mouth she puked all over herself :( She has been doing that and the doctor suspects it's a little reflux issue. Needless to say, we had to leave; you can't keep shopping after your child throws up all over themselves! So we went out to the car where I proceeded to get in the back seat with her and change her clothes and clean out the car seat. Oh and I forgot to mention it was like in the 70's here yesterday so it was really hot, in the car with the windows up! She has been doing better for the whole day that she has been on Zantac! I am hoping it helps because I just don't see how it could be ok for a baby to thrown up as much as she does!

That is all for now.